Crucible of Suffering and Our Sovereign God

Last week was the sort of hard week that feels like a month but also leaves one, come Saturday, asking, “Now what did I do this week? Why was it so unfruitful?”

We began with life-threatening health emergencies for not one but two family members. The human has an initial diagnosis and was given one medication to address the problem until the specialist appointment this week. We do not know the detailed prognosis or path forward yet, but I do not exaggerate in calling it life-threatening.

Moose Tracks, our dachshund-terrier mix, woke last Sunday with severe abdominal pain, to the point that when I tried to touch his middle, gently, to suss out the location of the pain, he yelped and ran away from me. He was diagnosed with pancreatitis caused by genetics, an infection of unknown cause, and “dietary indiscretions.” The emergency animal hospital kept him for 36 hours, then sent him home with 3 medications. That’s in addition to the inhaler he started using at the beginning of the year for the respiratory inflammation that caused his last emergency vet appointment in October. He’s been busy.

In addition, an essay into which I poured my heart, soul, mind, and strength was rejected for the fourteenth time. It seemed poor stewardship of time and energy to make further attempts.

Then the ice storm that blasted much of the United States hit here too, shutting everything down from Monday night through Thursday. Schools remained closed Friday too. We are grateful our power stayed on, and we didn’t suffer burst pipes or lose any tree limbs.

In the midst of that, the usual medical appointments, phone calls, and paperwork continued, and the caregiving and cooking and mounds of laundry that don’t stop for drama.

A Thanksgiving Prayer

American Snout

Moose Tracks

 O LORD our Lord, "You are a gracious God and merciful, slow to anger and abounding in steadfast love, and relenting from disaster" (Jonah 4:2, ESV).

Lord, we give you thanks first and foremost because of who you are: you are good, and your steadfast love endures forever. No matter our circumstances, that still is true.

Thank you that you loved us so much you sent your Son to die for our sins when we were wicked, enemies, rebel sinners, hostile toward you in thoughts and deed. I was a child of wrath, deserving your judgment, just like all the other sons of Adam and daughters of Eve. But in your great mercy you saved me and all others who trust Jesus, the Lamb of God who takes away the sin of the world. By grace we are saved, through faith, and this is not our own doing but your kind, free, and undeserved gift. Nothing we can do will make you love us more, and nothing we can do will make you love us less. For this I thank You.

You saved us and called us with a holy calling. You gave us new birth to a living hope through the resurrection of Christ Jesus. You have filled your book with the poem of good works you prepared for us to do before we even took our first breath. You did not save us because of our works, but you saved us for the work of loving you and loving our neighbors through Your Spirit who dwells in us.

That same Spirit binds Your daughters and sons together in one body, a community transcending time and geography. You lead us to each other with perfect timing and providential preparation. You assign various gifts and empower us for service and stewardship in the building up of Your church. You set the lonely in families and watch over the orphan and the widow. When all human helpers fail and comforts flee, You are the help of the helpless and companion of the solitary.

For all these things, O Lord, I thank you.

The Changing of the Guard Dog: Introducing Moose Tracks

As regular readers know, the late great Ebony Dog passed away June 1 after a brief illness. We initially thought we would take several months just to grieve and recover from the intensity and trauma of his final week. We reconsidered the timing, in part because this time we knew we needed a dog who would be great with the youngest nephews, who live close enough to see us frequently now. They would have more opportunities to get acquainted with Ebony's successor if we adopted before they went back to school, so we started looking in earnest and going to adoption events.

After one failed foster trial that clarified our non-negotiables, we found a dachshund-terrier mix on Petfinder with a happy face that looked a little like Eb’s. In fact, the facial resemblance is strong enough that Google photo assistant mixes them up on a regular basis. Appearance and appetite are where the resemblance ends, however!

He came to us as Diesel, but now he answers (when he feels like it) to the name of Moose Tracks, like the ice cream. His foster family was amazing and loved him dearly but couldn't adopt him permanently. We have stayed in touch with them, and his foster mom remains his biggest fan.

Moose Tracks (AKA Moosey, Moose, Moose Munch, Special Agent Shredder) is smart, social, silly, sassy, stubborn, and as devoted to Amore as Ebony was to me. He is so smart and curious that he gets bored and invents his own activities if we don’t provide enough stimulation. He is so social that Amore takes him to the dog park on weekends whenever the weather permits, and we are planning doggie daycare days into the routine because he needs and loves them. Ebony was a shy, calm, introverted dog, so there has definitely been a learning curve (which we’re still traveling) as we discover the rhythms and routines that work best for all of us.

Moose Tracks loves walks, training, sunbathing, meeting new people, and barking at the neighbors across the street when they come and go. He has 2 speeds: all out and crashed out. At the moment, he is crashed out, allowing me to put together this many-times-delayed post. (He is not a fan of the glowing screen thingies that pull his humans' attention away from him. Priorities, people!!)

He loves to eat almost anything: mulch, cookies, bully sticks, peanut butter inside a bone, “crunchy water” (ice), sticks, wood shavings, throw rugs, old pillows, stuffed animals, carrots,... He doesn’t like plain lettuce, but that may be the only thing he won’t eat. In fact, he has inspired the Moose Tracks Diet:

if it fits in my mouth, it’s food. If it does not fit in my mouth but I can break it into pieces that fit in my mouth, it’s food. If Mommy says, “No, no, Moose Tracks!! Leave it! Leave it!" It’s definitely food and probably really yummy.

He also has his own tongue twister: How much mulch would a Moose Tracks munch if a Moose Tracks could munch mulch? (The answer is “all of it.”)

Moose Tracks also adores his stuffed animals, but love hurts. I have a toy hospital with a revolving door. He tears one up, I sew it back together, he tears it up again, I repair it again, and so forth until there's not enough left to repair. I wouldn't bother, but he's just too cute when he plays with them, especially when he has a case of the zoomies and sprints around the house squeaking one in his mouth.

Moose has learned quite a few commands in our training sessions: sit, down, stay, come, place, leave it, heel, crate, paw, spin around, roll over, play dead, peekaboo, and drop it. We are working on find it, bring it, floor (when he climbs on something he shouldn't) and head down. He learns very quickly with the proper motivation (food). Heel and leave it are Mr. Curiosity's biggest challenges. Also, he is part billy goat and able to climb on anything he wants. We are still working on those boundaries.

As you can see, Moose tolerates the camera well, and the camera loves him. Today he has been in our family for 6 months. He adds a lot of laughter, makes our Fitbits happy, and challenges our creativity and training skills. We love him a lot! If you come to see us, expect kisses and a welcome waggin'.

Now that we're more settled into our new routine, I will endeavor to post here more consistently in 2019, but I make not promises. Also, I do micro-blog pretty regularly on Instagram: @crumbsfromhistable. Moose has his own feed for the dog people among you: @moosetracksmoore. (Do take what he says with a grain of salt. He is not always the most reliable narrator.)