A Prayer for the One Grieving a Parent

Listen to me pray this with you.

O God,

Father of the fatherless,

As lovingly mindful of each son and daughter as our own nursing mothers:

Enfold Your bereft children in Your own ineffable, unfailing love;

Console Your desolate chicks with Your sheltering wing;

Guide Your lost sheep with generous wisdom;

Carry the wounded and weary lambs in Your arms;

Abundantly provide daily bread for Your little ones;

Defend your cubs with loyal strength;

Apprehend the wanderers and bring them home to Yourself;

Nurture, cultivate, and celebrate every green sprout of virtue, worship, obedience, and calling;

Sing Your delight as our lullaby;

Establish broken hearts in the sustaining hope of restoration,

Until our Homegoing or our Lord's return.

Amen.

Totality

Click here to listen to me read this poem.

Grief is the soul’s totality—

Quenching color, light, song—

Darkness engulfing light,

Stars and planets twinkling 

At midday, breath stolen,

Chill breeze sweeping warmth away—

The light of God’s own countenance seems

Extinguished in the weeping vale.

Yet, though obscured, the sun still shines,

Undimmed, undamaged, undiminished.

Cosmic pebble nearest pale blue dot

Blocks from this dust speck’s eyes

The giant flaming star round which

Revolves the solar system.

Light flees,

But no sun departs;

Small obstacle in close proximity

Hides its great and glorious distant radiance.

Slithering shadow snakes snap at heels,

Unenvenomed phantom enemies,

No more harming sky-gazers

Than moon can harm sun.

This terror of great darkness,

Portentous and awesome—

Casting beholders facedown in dust and ashes,

In confused anguish and loss,

Foundations shaken—

Lasts only light and momentary minutes,

Measured by eternity’s rule.

However endless seconds seem,

They are but a blink, a breath,

Now, for a little time, if needed,

Until grave is swallowed up in victory.

Soon, soon, and very soon,

We shall always be with the Lord:

No more darkness, no more death;

Sorrow and sighing flee like stars 

At the sun’s resplendent revelation.

In the darkness, we wait.

In the darkness, we trust.

In the darkness, we hope

In unchanging truth:

The sun shines on;

God’s promises fail not;

His faithfulness endures,

While we see it not.

No Good Thing

Apologies for no audio today. If you need that, please let me know and I’ll add it as soon as may be. I am working towards a better way to do that. ❤️‍🩹🤗

No good thing—

Truly, unequivocally, particularly good—

Relinquished by the child of God

For the sake of obedience,

Love for Him,

Love for others—

No good thing 

Is ever truly lost,

Only forestalled.

Who am I,

Little woman,

To dream that I can give up

More than the Lord can restore?

In His good time,

He gives good gifts.

In this, I wait;

In this, I hope.

We sow good seeds,

Uneaten,

Into the tomb of the earth,

Denying today's pleasure

For Tomorrow's harvest of righteousness.

We may sow in tears

And bellies growling and empty,

But we will reap with shouts of joy.

Your kingdom come. 

We cannot outgive God.

Our troubles will be drowned in glory

We cannot fathom or dream

In our relinquishment.

In the Day of His blessed appearing,

I suspect

I will only regret

Not yielding even more.

Eternity is more than long enough

To surfeit souls with every good and perfect gift.

In Memoriam: My Mother

In the early morning hours of May 10, the open-armed Savior my open-hearted mother loves* welcomed her Home from her long, fraught pilgrimage through the shadowed valley of Alzheimer's. Her spirit and soul are free from the threadbare body, and her mind is clear, clearer than it has ever been. One day (come soon, Lord Jesus) her body too will be raised and glorified to be like the risen Christ's.

In our caregiving, we received many beautiful graces, "thin places" of experiencing God's love more deeply. There was also much anguish. Some of the numinous stories need writing, and a few will be shared in coming months. Words are hard to come by just now.

We are grateful Mom is no longer suffering, grateful her desire to receive care at home to the very end was granted, grateful for the helpers the Lord sent, especially nurse Emmily, and grateful for protection from all kinds of infections so that she stayed with us all the way until Alzheimer's itself took her. Most of all, we are grateful that we who love both Mom and Jesus will see them someday. And I am grateful that, with Mom with Jesus, and Jesus living in me, and me "in Christ" (as Paul often said), I can never be so very far removed from her. The communion of the saints has never meant more.

If you also know and love the Lord, I can't wait for you to meet her too.

If you don't yet, she would want you to know that Jesus gave His life on the cross for sinners like us so that all who receive Him by trusting Him would be cleansed and forgiven of sin and clothed in His righteousness. He gives to all who trust Him the right to be called children of God, and He then comes to take up residence in our hearts. He transforms us from the inside out until our bodies die or He returns and calls us Home.

We don't have to get our acts together to come to Him. We don't have to earn His approval. He offers love, grace, and welcome to sinners and enemies deserving of wrath, if only we come to Him and ask for His rescue.

"The righteousness of God is through faith in Jesus Christ to all who believe, since there is no distinction. For all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God; they are justified freely by his grace through the redemption that is in Christ Jesus."

‭‭Romans‬ ‭3‬:‭22‬-‭24‬ ‭CSB‬‬

*"Loves" because she still lives in spirit and loves the Lord better than ever now.

Other more coherent pieces about my dear mom:

Velveteen

Love Notes

Joy in Trials

"You rejoice in this, even though now for a short time, if necessary, you suffer grief in various trials so that the proven character of your faith —more valuable than gold which, though perishable, is refined by fire —may result in praise, glory, and honor at the revelation of Jesus Christ." ‭‭1 Peter‬ ‭1‬:‭6‬-‭7‬ ‭CSB‬‬

Click here to listen to me read this piece.

In these brief verses, the Holy Spirit through the apostle Peter shows us several characteristics of the Christian's trials.

First, they are brief: "now for a short time."

Second, when they happen, they are necessary: "if necessary."

Third, they are painful: "you suffer grief."

Fourth, they are varied: "various trials."

Next, they are purposeful: "so that the proven character of your faith…."

Finally, they are worthwhile and accomplish what will be rewarded: "…may result in praise, glory, and honor at the revelation of Jesus Christ."

Knowing that my painful and varied trials are brief, necessary, purposeful, and worthwhile enables me to rejoice in the midst of them. This is not spiritual bypassing. It is spiritual paradox. Grief, trials, and joy can coexist with none of them cancelling out the others. Sorrow and joy can dance together. Trials can increase rather than extinguish our hope.

If you are enduring sorrowful trials today, beloved child of God, I pray that the Lord would give you living hope that looks back to the real, bodily, historical resurrection of Jesus Christ and forward to our own real, bodily, future resurrection and forever life with Him.

Your pain is not useless or endless. You are not alone in it; the Lord Jesus is with you and lives in you through His Spirit. Hold fast to Him who holds you fast.

Courage, dear hearts. ❤️‍🩹